Such a Cliche!
by Dirty Little Half Blood
Summary: What if Hermione never kissed Ron in the Deathly Hallows? What if she decided that today was the day...What if Ron's idea of a perfect date was a cinema trip? Well let's see. Now Complete
1. Chapter 1

_**Hello readers :) Welcome to the world of Dirty Little Half-Blood xx...This was the result of bordem and a physics lesson, hope you enjoy...**_

_**I thought I would treat you all to a new story, think of it as my Christmas Present to you all. :D**_

_**Now for a little background info:**_

_*** For the purpose of this Fiction, Ron and Hermione are both 18 so it's all totally legal :D (in wizard and muggle worlds)**_

_*** Fred didn't die (reasons for this will become clear in the near future...also Fred didn't deserve to die..so there!)**_

_*** Hermione didn't kiss Ron in the Hogwarts halls(YES Hogwarts NOT inside the Chamber of Secrets-thank you very much Warner Bros)**_

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><p><em><strong>Hermione POV<strong>_

I found myself stood in front of the Burrow. Dust lingered around me, the dry ground crumbling under the hard soles of my purple converse. I stared up a the faded red roof, squinting through the bright sunlight, trying to see Ron's window...Although it was pretty pointless, considering it was now quarter past one. But Ron might have only just woken up...It was a Saturday after all...

But knowing Molly, she wouldnt want him to go without a decent meal. So Ron was sure to be sat at the table enjoying his lunch, or perhaps his second breakfast. Unbelieveable really, I told him we would get something to eat while we were out, but he said he'd need 'something for the journey'. How he hadn't reached the size of Vernon Dursley, I will never know...

But I had to say, Ron had an _amazing_ body. Toned, muscular but not steriod big...Thank Godric for Quidditch.

I wandered along the small lake that ran along the veranda of the Burrow and began to ponder about where we were going. Ron had been very mysterious about this. He told me Harry wasn't coming, and asked me to dress comfortably. I just hoped he wasn't planning another broomride.

I looked at my reflection, and began to doubt the efforts I had gone to to dress _comfortably_. Today I was going to make a move on Ron.

I know, cliche right? So many times I have wanted to grab that beautiful face and crash my lips to his...Have him wind his slender fingers through my bushy mane and never let go.

But of course this was the real world. Where I was fridgid and Ron was completely clueless as always. However dreamy he may be..

I realised how un-subtle I had made my efforts for attention. I was wearing a tight and fairly low cut purple vest under an open black shirt, with a pair of black shorts. My hair, although down and flowing, was sleek and fairly straight. Thank God for straightners and Skleek-Easy. My make up was light, apart from a little dark eyeliner. My lips a pale pink color and glossy.

My godric, I was showing off here! But like I said Ron wasn't exactly skilled in the art of subtlety...Nor had he been particularly good at taking hints

I jogged up to the house, my C cups bouncing all the way. I brushed myself off, neated my clothes and tried to de-dust my shoes. I knocked on the heavy wooden door. It was one of the Twins who opened the door.

"Hel-" He cut himself off mid speech and gulped. Apparently _he_ had noticed the trouble I had gone to.

"I believe the word you are looking for is, 'Hello'. Now..." I paused as I checked for a left ear, Nope, just a hole. It's George alright.

"...George, Can I come in?" I continued.

George's hazel eyes were wide and his jaw hanging. I coughed loudly to try and regain his attention from my, uh, assets.

"Huh? Oh, ah, uh_Yeah come in" he stuttered, his ear turning bright red.

I giggled a little under my breath. This plan just might work...

As I gave the ritual hellos, hugs and smiles...I noticed something. Something very...Very...Odd.

Ron wasn't at the table. Yet lunch had already been laid out, it had hardly been touched, so he couldn't have eaten already. A place had even been set for him. I wondered where he was hiding.

Molly seemed to solve the conundrum for me and stood at the base of the stairs. "Ron...Ron!...RONALD!" she screeched, getting louder and slightly more stern with each call.

"What Mum!" He called back in his deep voice, sounding almost worried- or maybe it was excitement...

I poked my head into the stairwell to let him know I was here "Hey" I said meekly.

"Hermione! Oh Bloody Hell, you're early!" he squeaked, panicked.."Gimme a sec, I'll be right down!" he added, muttering to himself.

As Ron entered the kitchen I heard a loud boom echo from upstairs. Definatly Fred...George rushed upstairs. I assumed to help clear the damage.

"Hey" said Ron nervously...Why he was nervous, I'll never know. Oh right! The outfit...

"Hi Ron" I smiled as I hugged him. My Godric...He looked gorgeous! Dark red 3/4 combats and a checked red and white shirt, with white tennis shoes. His hair all ruffled.

"You look...Amazing!" he said beaming, his ears going slightly pink.

I simply blushed in reply "You look really good too" I giggled, noticing his ears start to flame.

"Err. Mum, where are the car keys?" asked Ron meekly

"Hold on...car keys? Why do we need the car keys?" I asked curiously

"Well, I_ know _you hate flying and that's out the window" said Ron "Besides we're going back to London, right?"

I nodded in reply

"Well it'd look weird if we just appeared out of nowhere-so that throws out Apparation. So why not drive?" he added, smiling, looking rather pleased with his logic.

"W-w-well I suppose so yes! Are you feeling okay? You _actually_ thought about this? Planned for me_ and _thought ahead too!" I asked astounded

Ron wiped away a fake tear and sniffed "Well I do have _something_ between my ears, y'know" and giggled.

"So Mum? Car Keys?" he asked again.

"In the fruit bowl...Under the grapes, I think. I needed to find another place to hide them. The twins are after the car again" whispered Molly

I winked and placed a finger over my lips in reply. Ron giggled and dug for the keys in the bowl.

"Ready? Come on then, the film starts in an hour_ and _its a half hour drive!" called Ron as he jogged to the door, keys in hand.

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><p><em><strong>So then...Would you like to see more of this? Review and let me know. Also please don't be afraid to critisise...I won't cry. But I won't stand for flamers! YOU WILL BE REMOVED. You have been warned :P and BTW Merry Christmas People!<strong>_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Wow! I am amazed at how popular this story is :D I only hope this chapter lives up to expectations :P  
>DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hermione Jean Granger or Ronald Billius Weasley<strong>_

Hermione POV

We arrived at the cinema just in time to watch the trailers. Ron had booked us tickets for some crappy vampire movie adaptation of some crappy vampire book series.

But he said he'd done a little research and apparently _this _was what Muggle teen girls were into…But it was either that or some wizard thing, and after the last Wizarding War…That was the last thing I wanted to see.

The room was pretty empty, apart from a group of girls in 'Team Edward' t-shirts sat on the back row and another couple near the front. So Ron and I went in the middle right against the wall. I took the wall seat and he sat next to me.

It was about halfway through the film when Ron started moving around. I was sure I could hear him muttering to himself…I could hear him say things like 'just do it' and come on Ron you can do this'.

He kept breathing deep and huffing as though he was trying to ready himself for something. After a moment or to he yawned and stretched…Oh Merlin he wasn't going to…?

But he confirmed my worst fear, he put his arm around me…By yawning! How cliché…Or had I been mistaken, were we actually sat in some sort of 80's movie?

Fine if that's how he wants to play. I guess I'll just _have _to indulge him. I moved slightly in my seat hand and groaned a little.

"Are you ok, Hermione?" whispered Ron

I huffed slightly "Oh, I'm fine…It's just that these seats are so damn uncomfortable"

"Well then" said Ron quietly "maybe we should ditch this crappy movie and head back to mine, the Twins are at work and Mum and Dad are visiting Bill and Fleur" his voice was low and husky, his blue eyes smouldering.

"My goodness Mr Weasley, are you trying to get me alone?" I said innocently

Ron pulled me closer to him "If that's what you want…" He growled, nipping at my ear.

"Is it just me, or have things just got steamy in here?" I said smugly.

Ron sniffed "No…I think something's _burning_"

My eyes shot forward to the screen, it _was _burning_! _Flames flickered and curled around the screen. It must have overheated!

The fire alarm started screeching and the sprinklers turned on, water spurted and sprayed all around the theatre. I was frozen, rooted to my seat in panic. Ron grabbed my hand and pulled me through the seats to escape.

When we got out of the room, Ron pulled me aside to a corner and asked me if I was ok.

I couldn't reply, my heart was beating against my chest, my breathing ragged. We were both soaked through.

I could see the contours of Ron's muscular chest through his wet shirt, I stopped and listened. Adele's 'I set fire to the rain' was playing. I growled and leapt at Ron, crashing my lips to his as the chorus played, I felt myself burning into him, leaving my body and forming another with his.

Ron clearly wanted this kiss too, as I wound my hands into his fiery locks, he wrapped his arms around my waist and grabbed me with such enthusiasm he lifted me off my feet!

I heard various cat calls and wolf whistles from the people around us, but I didn't care. I had what I wanted. _We_ had what _we_ wanted…

I pulled away from Ron and said "I am now". I cupped his cheek in my left hand "Is everyone still out at yours?" I asked, Ron nodded in reply, I felt the lustful need grow deep within me as I growled "Well what are we waiting for?"

Ron didn't need telling twice…

_**Dun Dun Duh! Cliff-hanger moment! I know I'm evil, but I wanted to give you a small taster of what is to cum (Not a typo by the way ;P )**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Last chapter of this story now :) Also apologies for chapter 2…I didn't realise it was so short (stupid Microsoft!) :|**_

_**On a lighter note, I'm really happy about all the support this story has had…Anyway on with the smut ;) **_

_**Also this chapter will switch POV's mid chapter…just to make it a little easier to write and to understand the plot :P **_

_**You will know when the chapter has left Hermione's POV and gone to Fred's POV :) **_

_**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hermione or Ron, but I do own the dirty, smutty acts that they commit…M rated for a reason blah blah blah**_

Hermione POV

When we finally got to the car I came up with an idea to get back quicker. We would Apparate back to the burrow, and I had charmed the car to Apparate with us inside it.

Ron went open the door of the car but I grabbed his wrist to stop him.

"I can't wait…I need you right here. Right now" I said huskily

"Well I never like to disappoint a young lady, especially one as gorgeous as you" Said Ron, his voice strong and deep.

I moaned and whispered "Take me"

Ron's lustful urges kicked, he grabbed me around the waist and lifted me onto the backseat of the car before joining me. I froze suddenly as I looked out of the car window.

"Ron it's four in the afternoon! What if your parents come back?" I hissed

Ron simply wiggled his eyebrows and reached under the driver's seat. "I took the liberty of _borrowing_ this from one Harry James Potter." He said coolly

"You are amazing Ronald Weasley" I whispered sexily.

As Ron unfurled the cloak I placed a silencing spell on the car and an undetectable extension charm on the backseats, to give us a little more space. I also charmed to cloak to float above us, not so low that it moved when we did, but not so high that we could be seen below it.

I tore off my shirt, but Ron stopped me before I could take off my vest.

"Oh no, Miss Granger…I want to try something first." Said Ron sternly, as he gently wrapped his arms around me and positioned me so that I was sat up with my legs out in front.

"Close your eyes" whispered Ron forcefully, I followed his order.

As I sat there, my sight nonexistent, I felt a cool pair of hands wander under my vest and over my flat stomach, lips leaving hot, open mouthed kisses. I bit my lip to suppress a moan, and failed. Ron seemed to be encouraged by these moans and ventured further downwards…kissing my hips, then my thighs, then calves. He eased off my converse and tossed them aside, kissed my ankles then followed back up my claves and thighs.

"Please" I whispered

"What was that?" asked Ron, he'd obviously heard me- but wanted some sort of smug self satisfaction and wanted to hear me say it again.

"Please Ron" I whispered again, although a little louder than before

"Beg for me, beg me to touch you" growled Ron, his voice oozing authority. He traced the curve of my hips with his cool hands once more. Then he hooked a finger inside the edge of my shorts and eased them down, leaving my black girl boxers undisturbed.

He brought his head down between my legs and began kissing the bare skin of my inner thighs

My eyes shot open "Oh Merlin, please Ron more…more. I need you!" I moaned with yearning, arching out my back making my stomach cave in slightly.

A guttural snarl rumbled deep within Ron's chest as he pounced on me, pushing me down flat. He grazed his teeth along a path from my navel to the edge of my boxers, he gripped them with his teeth and tore away the black linen that came between me and virginity.

"Never one to disappoint" he repeated, his blue eyes glittering as they raked over my exposed lower body.

"So beautiful…You're like a drug to me…you know that?" Growled Ron, his cool fingers tracing shapes mindlessly over my thighs.

"Well then baby," I replied sexily, leaning forward and undoing his shirt "get ready to OD"

He pushed me back and lowered his head down to my core and began teasing it with his tongue, grazing my clit with his teeth.

"Easy Ronald" I gasped "Keep that up and this will all be over too soon."

He seemed to ignore this comment and instead became more frantic and frenzied in his efforts. He lapped and teased more and more, I began to buck and tremble with pleasure, unable to control myself. Ron sensed this erratic movement and snaked an arm over my stomach to hold me down while he slid the other under my vest and into my bra.

His hand started to knead and massage my left breast roughly, tugging at the nipple now and then.

Soon he stopped playing with my breast and skimmed his hand across the pale flesh of my abdomen, over my hips and onto my ass, cupping and rubbing the bare, ashen skin. He slapped it mildly and rubbed it afterwards. I hissed slightly t the pain but smiled at the burning feeling as it offered a slight pleasure and thrill. I purred as the pain and pleasure began to blend into one incredible sensation…Ron seemed to be encouraged by these noises too and started to slap harder.

When he had finished spanking me, he trailed a single finger around the back of my thigh to my pussy, and slid the slim finger inside me, hooked it and began to pump, hitting my G-Spot with the curved digit with every thrust.

I could feel the pressure building within me, I was getting tighter, rising higher and higher until…

"RONALD!" I screamed in ecstasy, my orgasm hitting me like a Stunning Spell.

Ron stroked me lightly as I rode out my orgasm. My chest was heaving and my breathing ragged. I could feel a bead of sweat trickling down my temple.

"Good Lord, Ron…Are you _sure _you've never done this before?" I panted, still recovering from my pleasure.

"Let's just say I did my research, Muggle Movies and the 'Intabet' are very helpful for first dates." Stated Ron coolly

"I think you mean _internet _and please don't tell you have been looking at _pornography!_" I said, a little concerned for Ron's innocence.

Ron began to blush. "Wh-what? No! Hermione Granger, I am shocked that you would think such things of me!" said Ron, hurt. "I just watched a few teen romance films so I knew what you Muggles did at the cinema…I guess the whole sex thing comes naturally to me"

I began to giggle at the thought of Ron watching Muggle films, planning his moves and phrases…That would explain his self-pep talks at the cinema!

Then I felt something deeper…My heart began to swell as I realised just _how much_ effort Ron had gone to for this date. I felt warm tears trickle down my cheek.

Ron's face paled "Hermione…W-W-What's the matter? Why are you crying? Did I hurt you? Did I do something wrong?" his voice was panicked and fast.

I wiped my eyes and shook my head, smiling. "No, Ron. You didn't do anything wrong. Nobody has _ever_ gone to this much effort for me before! You have made me feel sospecial…In fact you have blown me away!"

Ron's face flooded with colour again and grinned from ear to ear,

"Speaking of blown away, It's time I repaid that favour" I said, my voice husky and breathy.

I slowly ran my hands down his still slightly damp chest through his open shirt. Tracing my fingers over the contours and ripples of his torso, placing light kisses where my fingers had once been. I pushed him so that he was sitting with his legs out in front of him while his back rested against the door and straddled him, I could feel him straining against his combats. But I wasn't going to give him release _just_ yet.

I kissed his jugular softly and worked my way across his collarbone with butterfly kisses. Eventually I found the spot where vampires normally bit their victims, this seemed to please him. He purred and groaned as I caressed the area. I kissed the spot harder and rougher, I licked it lightly then sunk my teeth deep into the warm flesh, leaving my imprint -claiming Ron as my own. He gasped as I bit down, and then started to purr again.

I shimmied down his body, kissing a trail down his torso as I went. I popped open the button and undid the zipper with my teeth. He was wearing maroon boxers. He may have hated that colour (or perhaps it was just the maroon Christmas jumpers he _always _got from his Mother), but it sure did suit him.

His bulge was prominent against its cotton confines. I ghosted my hand over it, teasing him just as he had teased me.

I eased down his boxers and paused in awe of the sight before me.

He was around 10 inches long, and thick. I feared for my poor nether regions…He was going to tear me apart!

I decided that I would worry about that later and began to taunt Ronald a little more. I delicately kissed the pinkish head of his circumcised cock and trailed kisses down his shaft.

I ran my fingers up and down the underside of his dick, causing him to tremble and leak a little pre-cum. I don't know why, but I felt the urge to lick it away…I certainly wasn't going to deny myself.

I licked away the thick goo with the tip of my tongue, keeping eye contact with Ron. His eyes went wide as I lapped the pre-cum from his cock –it was as though he couldn't believe what I was doing…Although, to be honest, neither could I!

It was such an empowering feeling. To feel him quiver and writhe under my touch, I could understand why he had so much fun giving me oral. I kissed the head of his cock once more and formed a makeshift cock ring with the index finger and thumb of my left hand…_Don't judge me! Ron's not the only one who did his research on this! _

I took the top of his cock into my mouth and slowly took more and more of him in, keeping eye contact with him the whole time…

_**Meanwhile, inside The Burrow…**_

Fred POV

"I checked the fruit bowl, Freddie! The damn keys aren't in there!" squealed George, rummaging through a kitchen drawer.

"Alright Georgie Boy, keep your knickers on!" I chuckled, George was so cute when he was frustrated.

I walked over to George, twirled him to face me and placed my hands on his shoulders.

"Just keep calm and think, if _you _were Mum, where would you hide the spare car keys from us?" I told George, trying to calm him a little.

He scrunched his nose as he pondered deeply and I furrowed my brow as I wondered too.

Then came the light bulb moment…

"The bread bin!" we shouted triumphantly

I rushed over and looked under the sliced loaf, and sure enough, there were the spare keys. I pulled them out from under the bread, shook off the crumbs and shoved them into the back pocket of my jeans.

"Are you sure about this Fred? We could just _Apparate _to London." said George thoughtfully.

"Trust me, George. Women love three things, Scars. Cars. And Gingers" I said smoothly, running my left hand through my hair and pointing to his ear (or rather lack of ear) with my right hand.

"Bad luck for you then Fred seeing as I've got the hatrick, you know what they say, three's the magic number! " giggled George. It was nice to see him laugh again.

"Come on then your Holiness, let's go before all the hot girls are taken."

"Fuck off Fred!" retorted George. He was so easy to annoy, its _untrue!_

I pulled the keys from my pocket and tossed them in the air absently as we walked to the car.

We were off to London for the night, neither of us had gotten laid since

Christmas, it was now August. I wasn't sure about George but I was suffering from a serious case of Blue Balls. Personally, I was rather looking forward to a night of Muggle clubs, vodka and maybe heading to a hotel!

George, on the other hand, was nervous to say the least. This was the first time we had been out properly since…the incident.

During the Battle of Hogwarts, I was millimetres away from being hit with a Killing Curse. Poor Lavender Brown got hit instead of me, although with what Fenrir Greyback had done to her, I wouldn't have wanted to live either. George didn't want to leave me alone after that, let alone leave the Burrow. You'd think it was me who'd go all agoraphobic _not him!_

This was kind of a way of cheering him up. Merlin knows that a girl was an easy way to distract Old Georgie Boy.

As we got to the car, we found the doors unlocked.

"Well that makes an hour spent searching for the keys worthwhile!" I said sulkily.

"True Freddie, but if I know our mother, and I do believe I _do_, then she'd have charmed the car somehow to only start with those bloody keys" said George coolly.

"You're a genius Forge!" I squealed as I sat down in the driver's seat.

"Tell me something I don't know Gred" giggled George.

Suddenly, through no fault of my own, I jolted forward in my seat.

"Whoa! Did you feel that mate?" I asked, puzzled.

"What are you on about Fred? Feel what?" asked George, sounding just as puzzled as I did…That is, until he jolted forward in his seat too.

"You mean that?" Whispered George warily.

I nodded then whispered back "Why are we whispering?"

"Dunno, just makes it seem cooler" replied George, his voice still hushed

"Fair point…Maybe we should see what's moving the seats"

We nodded to each other and kneeled on our seats to look at the back seats. They looked exactly as they should, except…Was that the toe of a shoe? Looked like a converse to me, just like the ones that George said Hermione was wearing this morning.

George brushed his hand across the empty space, and seemed to have caught hold of something. He clutched it between his fingers and pulled it away. Nothing could have prepared me for the sight we would see.

Ickle Ronnie was naked and sweaty atop an equally sweaty and naked Hermione! The lack of sound suggested a Silencing Spell. From the look on Hermione's face, Ron wasn't doing too badly either, her eyes were closed and she was biting her lip. I recognised that look…she was about to cum.

Ron was pumping harder and faster, he moved his head to her neck –it looked like he was either kissing, biting or doing a combination of the two, his hands firmly gripping her hips.

Hermione's face contorted with what I could only _assume_ was pleasure. She mouthed something which resembled 'Ron' and her eyes shot open, bulging slightly. Her back arched in, pressing her body to his.

They both trembled and shook, Hermione caught sight of us immediately, her coffee brown eyes smouldering. Ron had obviously noticed something was wrong and turned to see what had disturbed Hermione. When he spotted us all colour left his face.

I turned to look at George, his expression was only what I could assume was a mirror image of mine…surprise and a little bit of pride.

"Wait 'til Mum…" I chuckled

"…hears about this" giggled George as he threw the cloak back over them.

_**Finite**_


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